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How to Ruin Your Day in Santorini is a short-story length memoir about a clueless American family let loose on a Greek island. After an ill-fated ATV ride through pedestrian alleyways lands them in trouble with angry locals, this family's holiday plans turn to one goal: make it back to the cruise ship before the police find them. *** “I’d have a little more confidence if you didn’t look so worried,” Faith says. I grip the handlebars. One thumb pushes the gas at the same time the other squeezes the brake. The ATV jerks by inches toward the street. “It’s fine, babe,” I say with forced optimism. Faith’s helmet rests on my back, hiding her eyes. “I don’t trust you!” I try to rouse a sense of indignation, but I can’t. She has good instincts. I take a deep breath and give myself a pep talk: I am completely capable of mastering this death machine.